Advice

Jealousy

Life is constantly plagued with unrealistic standards that our subconscious craves to meet someday, even if they are unattainable. People have felt inadequate for centuries because they draw comparisons between each other, tearing themselves down for not being like their neighbors. This feeling of insecurity and envy over someone else’s success is most commonly referred to as jealousy. While jealousy is one of the ugliest emotions that a person can feel, it is one of the most uncontrollable and natural of emotions that even the most composed human beings feel. Jealousy will always be ever-present, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be ignored.  

 

The first step to ignoring jealousy is deciphering it. Getting to the source of your jealousy is important to observe because then, it will be easier to see how we can come to a solution. Jealousy is an irrational emotion that can temporarily go away with enough reasoning. Think about it this way: is it reasonable for an 11-year-old online to be jealous of an Instagram influencer twice her age because of her body? The answer is obviously no because this tween can’t possibly compare her prepubescent body to that of an adult model on the internet. It’s irrational that she would even go as far as to think that she should have that body at her age, but she did because her jealousy stems from the fact that she is insecure about her body. That very real situation is a way to rationalize the irrational. Starting from the stem, up the leaves, and finally reaching the blooming petals, prying them open so they see the light.    

 

The next step to ignoring jealousy is to acknowledge it. After having found the source and trying to rationalize it, recognize that it exists and let it go. Allow yourself to feel jealousy through and through, not letting it overwhelm you, so you can get rid of it for the time being. I know, like most things in life, this is easier said than done but releasing that stem is a way to recognize this feeling as silly instead of actual. Jealousy is a primitive emotion, but it’s foolish and absurd. It feels like we’ve evolved further past jealousy, but once again we are reminded of our once beastly instincts with this feeling. However, it’s still important to feel this natural emotion. Once you’ve rationalized the feeling, you feel the need to justify this nonsense, which helps you analyze the thoughts and emotions that led you to feel so green. Once that occurs, it’s easier to let go of whatever was tormenting you so that you can move on with your life. In this modern world with apps like Instagram and TikTok, it is easier to feel jealous. Everyone’s lives are on full display with the intent to create jealousy, but you have the power to ignore them.    

 

To get over jealousy, you must acknowledge and feel it all the way through until it doesn’t serve a purpose anymore. This is necessary, however, you must be careful and not let feeling jealousy completely consume you. Being trapped in jealousy is like being stuck in quicksand, and you’re sinking fast. Sinking into jealousy makes life look like a contest, an unprompted competition for who has the best clothes, friends, social life, body, face, etc. When you feel that you are sinking, try to pull yourself out or have someone do it for you because losing yourself in any emotion is not good. Remember that no one is immune from jealousy, but that doesn’t mean you should let this ugly feeling take over your life and consume you. Jealousy, believe it or not, has severe consequences. It can cause emotional inability, anxiety, extreme bitterness, depression, and even the break of meaningful relationships. Jealous people tend to be destructive and insecure because they feel that the prying eyes of the world are constantly on them, judging them for not being someone else. Indulge in this feeling and you may never be able to get yourself out of the jealous cycle. So, my advice to prevent this is to catch yourself when you see that jealousy has bled into other areas of your life where it previously didn’t exist. Contain and destroy it at the stem before it spreads too far.

 

Everyone is jealous of something; it’s a part of life to want something you can’t have. Even the people who we envy feel jealousy from time to time because life is never enough to satisfy the human brain. Jealousy will always exist, but it can be ignored through intervention and prevention. You must find the stem of your jealousy and try to rationalize this irrational feeling to further understand how this aspect of your life can be fixed. I say, in order to disregard jealousy, you must feel it through and through first, without letting it consume you. However, It’s not as simple as I put it because this complex feeling has a way of taking over like none other. Jealousy is a destructive, dangerous feeling that we must be cautious of if we want to overlook it. Jealousy is an animal instinct that we humans have inherited, but choosing not to act on our jealousy is what distinguishes us from those animals. Here is one last reminder: no one actually cares that much. You are just protecting yourself from the judgment of a person that thinks as you do. Protecting yourself from you. So maybe if we stop putting so much pressure on ourselves to be something that is fairly unattainable, we wouldn’t walk around jealous and angry of the rest of the world for being successful.

 

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